October 2025 "Delectable Discourse 2: What Horror Movie Do You Think You Could Survive?" by Emily Rawlings

As the spooky season approaches and people start watching more horror movies, it can be ridiculous to see how avoidable on-screen horrific circumstances can be. Consequently, in this second issue of Delectable Discourse, where I ask college students a scrumptious new question each month, I asked, “ What horror movie do you think you could survive and how?”

• “I don’t watch horror movies. What’s like a popular horror movie? I could survive Silence of the Lambs. I could definitely survive Children of the Corn. Like literally leave. They are like ‘Oh, let’s go into this scary town where children want to kill you.’ Like walk out of the corn. I think I could survive Silence of the Lambs because I am not scrumptious enough. Jaws: don’t go out into the ocean. Hmm, a killer shark? Just don’t go into the ocean. Move to Montana or something.” -Hannah

• “Resident Evil because, same as Children of the Corn, I would just walk away. Like most horror movies, you can just walk away.” -William

• “God, this is hard! I don’t think I could survive any of them. Generally, a slasher movie; you could just hide somewhere with a buddy. Don’t be alone.” -Uly

• “Jaws: I wouldn’t get in the water.” -Alexandra

• “Umm, I… this is a difficult one because I hate horror movies, so it makes it worse. Fallout. I think I would survive that world because I love the videogames, so I am a semi-expert in the environment. I would be a vault-dweller, so I wouldn’t be out in the wasteland. If I am out in the wasteland, I would live in a settlement that has a lot of security, so I would be really safe. I could be in the brotherhood because they have a lot of training and armor. As long as it doesn’t have spiders in there, I should be great. As long as there aren’t any insects.” -Sebastian

• “I can’t think of any horror movies. I don’t think I would survive. I would fall over because I am scared while running away. Any of them that walk or move really slow could be outmaneuvered.” -Anonymous

• “Ah, umm, horror movies, I haven’t seen a lot of horror movies. I would probably say It because he feeds off fear. Because of the way he looks, I wouldn’t be scared; I would just laugh at him like a bully, because who couldn’t look at that face and just laugh. Uh, let me think... I would survive The Conjuring because I am broke, so I wouldn’t even be able to afford the house and wouldn’t be allowed in there. Hum, Ghostface doesn’t seem super scary. A man is teaching me how to knife fight, so I could totally evade Ghostface’s amateur knife-fighting skills. He doesn’t have any defensive skills! He moves kind of slow... I’ve never actually seen that movie.” -A girl with a knife (self-described)

• “I could survive the 2025 Until Dawn by smashing the hourglass clock. There is some kind of power in the sand or something. Um, and the monster doctor couldn’t tell time, probably, or else he would have been wearing a watch. I could also survive through every season of the series From because I would summon my, oh, hey, vocal prowess, and— what is it called when you sing the right note, and it shatters glass?—Yeah, yeah, I would do that. It would shatter their teeth and their eardrums and their eyeballs and their nasal blood vessels, and what else? And their kneecaps.” -Paula